"After All My Children is canceled, Susan Lucci seeks Victoria's comfort. She attempts to better the ladies' lives by giving Valerie a weight loss method, Elka a handy new invention, and setting Joy up with a handsome young doctor. However, her attempt to "help" may actually be a strategy for revenge, as it soon becomes clear to the ladies that you can take the actress out of the soap opera, but you can't take the soap opera out of the actress."
"An Oakland, CA woman and her adult son confront his ex about her lies and the paternity of her daughter."
"A Chicago man regrets signing a birth certificate 18 years ago and now demands a DNA test."
"A Detroit man believes he is not the biological father, even though he is on the birth certificate."
"Samuel wants to be a standup comic. Meanwhile, Molly offers advice to Harry which leads to him challenging his protective mother."
"Mike and Molly decide to try having a baby. Carl is upset to learn Molly has been spending time with his ex-girlfriend Christina."
Kevin stars in a commercial.
Nick tries to help suzanne get over a phobia.
"After spending some quality time with Chris, Carter decides to make him the heir to his entire fortune. Peter becomes jealous because of this and starts sucking up to Chris in hopes of getting close to the money."
When Jennifer (Bianca Kajlich) and Russell (David Spade) decide to teach Adam (Oliver Hudson) a lesson in responsibility, the joke is on them when Adam has the last laugh.
Kramer suffers side effects from his head injury. NBC gives Jerry and George another meeting and on the way, Jerry throws out a watch his parents gave him. He then meets his Uncle Leo, who picks the watch out of the garbage. Kramer agrees to be an alibi f
Unsatisfied by the quality of commercially cut meats, Kramer buys his own meat slicer, and takes things a bit too far. Elaine can't catch a break, as her neighbor’s alarm clock and cat drive her crazy. Jerry gets annoyed when the dermatologist Elaine set
Doug surprises Carrie with a romantic weekend away at a resort. Doug and Carrie try to get over an argument they've been having, but only make things worse. Deacon finds Spence and Danny in bed together. Arthur decides he is in an emergency situation.
Now that Deacon and Kelly have separated, Doug makes it his mission to get his friend out of the funk he's been in by taking him out to the clubs. Doug starts to realize he's been missing the days of hanging out with the singles and starts making a habit
When he’s angered by a mall Santa, Stewie convinces Brian to drive him to the North Pole so he can kill Santa Claus.
"In trying to help Barney and Maxine's budding relationship, Burt and Virginia wind up getting in a fight. Meanwhile, Jimmy and Sabrina decide to start fencing in order to relieve some of the tension in their relationship."
As Abed (Danny Pudi) struggles to stay sane without his best friend, Jeff (Joel McHale) agrees to represent Shirley (Yvette Nicole Brown) in a case against Pierce (Chevy Chase) to determine official ownership of their new sandwich shop. Meanwhile, Troy (D
"Bobby decides he cannot continue to rely on Jules' financial help, but when Jules discovers this, she comes up with a plan to continue to help him. Meanwhile, Ellie thinks she's smarter than everyone, and the gang decides to prove her wrong, and Laurie and Smith breakup."