"After All My Children is canceled, Susan Lucci seeks Victoria's comfort. She attempts to better the ladies' lives by giving Valerie a weight loss method, Elka a handy new invention, and setting Joy up with a handsome young doctor. However, her attempt to "help" may actually be a strategy for revenge, as it soon becomes clear to the ladies that you can take the actress out of the soap opera, but you can't take the soap opera out of the actress."
Niece Renee hits town for a scholarship interview, but is she actually worthy of the honor? Elsewhere, Bart's caustic nephew, an aspiring fireman, visits the fire station and hopes to smoke Malik in a firefighting challenge.
Things get "Payneful" for young Jazmine when she has to undergo surgery for appendicitis. Elsewhere, Curtis goes on a rat patrol at the firehouse, trying to exterminate a pesky rodent.
"Fourth-grade teacher Molly Flynn meets, and falls for, police officer Mike Biggs at Overeaters Anonymous and asks him to talk to her class."
"Mike decides to take things into his own hands and find out if he is fertile enough to make a baby with Molly. Meanwhile, Vince starts working as a door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesman."
Suzanne and nick go out with another couple but things do not go well.
Nick asks suzanne to help pro baseball player plan a charity event.
"Jerome is none-too-happy with Chris dating his daughter, Pam, which leads the two kids to run away, necessitating that Jerome and Peter team up to find them."
When Jeff discovers that a guy is giving Audrey home Pilates classes, he wants to make a change. Meanwhile, Adam tells Jennifer specifics about his football past.
Because of the presets she discovers on his car radio, Elaine thinks that David is religious. George tries to skip office meetings so the staff thinks he's funny. Kramer and Mickey take up acting gigs in a local hospital, performing people with serious di
"Crazy" Joe leaves Jerry a message saying he will put the "kibosh" on him. Kramer has tickets for the opera, Pagliacci, and everyone is going including Elaine and her boyfriend "Crazy" Joe. Elaine drops in on Joe's apartment and is she surprised by what s
Doug sabotages Carrie's attempts to start hanging out with her co-workers by scaring them off with several crude techniques. Meanwhile, Spence and Danny realize that women like men who take care of the elderly and start using Arthur as bait.
Doug cannot spend time with Carrie on Valentines Day, because he has to deliver penguins, with Deacon, from one zoo to another. Yet, along the way, they run into some mishaps. Meanwhile, Carrie inadvertently fixes Holly up with her boss. Also, when Arthur
"When her old flame Johnny Revere (Huey Lewis) comes to Cleveland to record a song for charity, Victoria assumes they'll pick up where they left off, though Johnny might have other plans in mind. Meanwhile, Elka wants a lock of a singer's hair for a good cause, Melanie attempts to hook up with a musical idol, and Joy will stop at nothing to make her dream of being a rock star come true."
"Jimmy offers to go to a Halloween party with Sabrina when her boyfriend can't make it. Meanwhile, Burt tries to play tricks on his son, while Virginia takes her grandmother trick-or-treating."
Professor Duncan's (guest star John Oliver) efforts to “cure” Abed (Danny Pudi) of his pursuit of the meaning of Christmas launches everyone into a holiday clay-mation fantasy world.
"Jules struggles with the news that Travis was accepted to two of his college choices and now he must decide between California and a school 20 minutes from home. Grayson is there for Jules this time. Meanwhile, Smith returns from law school and Laurie considers her feelings for him, while Andy wants to do whatever he wants in his house and not be commanded by Ellie's rules."