3/6/2007

Viewers always ask about which films I’d like to show, or which are my favorites that we’ve shown- but, what about some of the flicks we’ve had that I could have done without? Yes, there are a few we’ve had that could’ve gone directly into the bulk eraser (that’s the machine we use to erase tapes by bombarding them with intense magnetic fields) and nobody would have suffered. Both here and at the previous station where I did “Son of Svengoolie” –there have been a few I just couldn’t stand. We had one not too long ago, last year…a weak film called “Midnight Movie Massacre.” It’s a film within a film, as folks go to a movie theater to watch a “Space Patrol” flick- when an actual alien creature lands on the theater, invades, and starts killing people off. First of all- there were quite a few edits we made- for gross-out humor that just wasn’t funny, other stuff that wasn’t within the guidelines of what we’re allowed to broadcast, and –stuff SO boring and drawn out that it didn’t even provide any entertainment or plot advancement. The “Space Patrol” movie stuff didn’t fit well with the rest of the movie- even though it was an homage to the old 50s television show, and even included one of the original cast members. The ending of the film was incredibly stupid – I’m not going to reveal it, just in case we (gulp) ever run it again. Another real loser was “Terror Vision”- another lame film with very little to recommend it. There’s a computer site called “terrorvision” that- when people log on- activates all sorts of electronic mayhem, killing and/or capturing the websurfers. There were a handful of cool effects, like a mechanical sort of killer “bug” that rolled up into a ball and chased people, but then unfolded into a sort of centipede-like robo-beast. But, there was a LOT of time-wasting junk...including endless “music videos”- if your idea of a music video is a lousy song put to footage of jerks driving around endlessly. To make matters worse, the songs included some obscenities (when you run out of creative ideas- swear!) A real loser from the “Son of Svengoolie” days is a cheap old American International film with a promising title –“Beast with a Million Eyes!” An alien lands in the desert, and can control the minds of animals and some people. If I remember correctly, I don’t think we ever even SEE the damn thing! Any shots of it are done from the “Beast’s” point of view. You do get Dick Sargent –the second “Darrin” from “Bewitched”- but little else. The story was- American International bigwig James Nicholson came up with the title, and put together a great ad campaign for the movie- before there even WAS a movie. The ads were so good, he managed to pre-sell the film to movie distributors. When they actually saw the film, they were all disgusted, because it was so lousy. Maybe I’ll revisit this topic again – and, watch out, because you may revisit the movies I’ve mentioned- but don’t say I didn’t warn you!