2/13/2007

Oops! Yesterday was Lincoln’s birthday, and, as a loyal son of Illinois, I didn’t even mention it- my apologies. Didn’t we used to get Lincoln’s birthday off here in the “Land Of Lincoln?” Hey, it was even on a Monday, the official ‘transplant-any-holiday’ day off. I know, we don’t get that day off because now there’s “President’s Day”- formerly Washington’s birthday, but I guess that Taft (not Jerry) and Wilson (not Carnie) whined and complained because THEY didn’t get a special birthday holiday, so EVERYBODY- from Nixon to J. Quincy Adams-got lumped into one big “Hail to the Chief-a-palooza.” Come to think of it, I don’t get that day off either. I don’t get MY birthday, March 12, off either- unless it’s on a Saturday or Sunday. Anyway, back to Honest Abe- the guy on our pennies, and our license plates. I always wonder how Abe would feel to find his name attached to almost anything these days…from carpet companies, to insurance companies, to a luxury car- especially the fine auto that starred in our movie last Saturday, “the Car”…the railsplitter certainly wouldn’t have enjoyed a car labeled with his name (a LINCOLN Mark III) riding around killing people (maybe it should’ve been a “John Wilkes Booth” Mark III? Okay, I’ll be getting complaints on that one…) Do you think Lincoln would’ve liked Sven? After all, we both wear the top hat- although my original hat was more of a stovepipe than my current one…we both did our homework on the back of a shovel, although I had a heck of a time fitting it into the typewriter. We both had run-ins with a guy named Douglas- my musical accompanist Doug Graves always gives me heck about my singing. Ooh, this is turning into one of those “Lincoln/Kennedy” parallel bits- remember those? “Lincoln had a secretary named Kennedy- and Kennedy had a secretary named Lincoln, etc.?” OOH! I had a director named Kennedy, back at Fox! Wow, this just gets eerier and eerier ! Lincoln had a vice-president named Johnson- and Kennedy had a vice-president named Johnson- and, when I was a baby, my mom used baby powder by Johnson and Johnson!… I better quit while I’m behind. Props to Abraham Lincoln- who had a son named Tad, and I’m a tad idiotic….